22 Funny and Timeless Real Estate Memes for Agents
I thought of (almost) all of these myself! I can spit some meme game, if I do say so myself. Going to turn these into some viral tweets in a moment….
CINC, BoomTown, kvCORE, Curaytor, Lofty, ….
My own broker has been through at least 4 different “complete platforms” since I joined them in 2013.
When things aren’t working, better technology is too often the answer.
“If only I have better automation or better usability, it will work!”
Well, I wrote here about how good technology cannot replace good operations.
Time Management is My Passion
Or pick your social media poison: YouTube, or Pinterest, or Instagram, or TikTok, or….
Or Android games on my Samsung phone. I figure I deserve a few moments of relaxation and 3 hours later…
Did I mention YouTube?
A Picture Says 1000 Words
C’mon people.
I get the market is hot right now, but you’re not just advertising the home. You’re advertising yourself.
Check out my professional photographers page. You can get 3D tour, floorplan, and pro pics from Matterport for just $299. What is your excuse?
Wait, Wut?
Seems like it would be hard to terminate something that’s already been executed.
Either way, RIP.
All By Myself…..
It me.
The next big thing in real estate marketing….
When I started, “start a blog” advice was pervasive. It seemed like every agent was starting a blog.
They’d write 3 articles and then wonder where their leads were.
Uh….lead generation takes a little more than that, I’m afraid.
Writing a successful blog takes a lot of time and consistency. I wrote about some successful real estate bloggers if you want to get an idea of what success looks like.
What a great scene
I rewatched this scene while making this meme. What an incredible 2 minutes of character building. Steven Spielberg is a genius.
And yeah – nobody cares how it’s pronounced, you scolds!
Zaters be like….
I don’t know about your state, but in Texas you cannot officially get your real estate license until you’ve complained about the quality of Zillow leads.
The reality is that top agents spend, in some cases, millions a year on Zillow leads (or Realtor.com). Unlike too many agents, they follow up with those leads quickly and consistently, converting them into transaction 6, 12, 24 months after first getting the lead.
2% is a typical conversion rate for these leads. Only 1 out of 50! If you can’t deal with that, then don’t buy Zillow leads.
Repair Concessions
I once represented the buyer on a home. We got the inspection and shared it with the listing agent, a part-timer.
The poor guy apparently advised his seller that they would need to fix everything, which is exactly what they did. We didn’t even have to propose a repair amendment!
That’s the only time I’ve had that happen.
A few other times, I failed to manage my buyers’ expectations regarding the inspection and, unfortunately, it never turns out well.
Maybe in some very favorable buyer markets buyers can expect everything on the inspection. But that is pretty exceptional, I’d imagine.
Instagram Ready
C’mon!
Success Mindset
Worked for me!
Attention to Detail
Sorry ’bout that, title company, broker compliance officer, and lender.
Remember to add the date field in DocuSign for that last signer!
Step 1: License, Step 3: Profit
I got my license before my phone screened calls for “Potential Spam”.
What a lifesaver that filter is.
“If you want to get rich, sell stuff to Realtors.”
The cold calling from technology vendors (many of whom I review on this site) were shocking!
And speaking of that, now I see this new strategy that sales folks are trying! This is messed up!
Heck no! I’m a salesman! You can’t trick me at my own game!
Friggin Open Houses, amirite?
Ok. This one is not really a joke. I’m dead serious.
Does anyone else get anything out of open houses?
I wasted so much of my time as a newbie in empty open houses for builders playing games on my computer.
I imagine not all agents agree. I even have a guide to hosting open houses, a one-stop shop for the best advice in the industry on open houses.
“Business Development”
Follow up. Follow up. Follow up.
Consistency wins all.
It will take 6-12 months to turn a contact into a closing.
But business cards are nice, too.
How to Price a Home
I wrote an awesome article about how to make a CMA. Seriously. Pricing homes is one of the few things on which I consider myself an expert.
Respect my pricing skills, appraisers!
Anyway, that just makes it all the more frustrating when an appraiser comes in and blows your deal up.
In the hot 2021 market, I had over 75% of my deals come in with a low appraisal. I even left snacks and Gatorade for the appraiser once and still got lowballed.
The definition of “fair market value” is what a willing buyer and seller agree it is … unless an appraiser says otherwise apparently.
Job Description
So I cheated. This one isn’t new, but is one of my favorite real estate memes. It certainly matches my own experience.
What do agents really do? They make below minimum wage, in many cases!
Web Presence Perfection
I wrote that websites are one of the #1 things I think most agents waste money on.
I had 3 at one point.
I think I still have 2? Although I think the domain expired on one.
Anyway, you don’t need a website. Don’t bother with a website unless you are going to be intentional about it.
Location, Location, Location
In my neck of the woods (Copperas Cove), there is a neighborhood that backs up to a hill that is prone to landslides.
As you can imagine, it impacts home values.
I don’t think they have anything to complain about versus these folks, though.
Keeping Your Options Open
Should you keep looking when under contract?
That’s not an easy question!
Real estate agents just want the deal to close. It’s not their house. Anything that derails the path to closing means a longer time before they see their commissions.
But should a client continue with their current deal if a legitimately better option comes on?
Or maybe keeping options in mind in case the current deal doesn’t work out is a good idea?
Whether your buyer keeps looking probably depends on the buyer. But jumping on a current deal for a new, shiny house is a frustrating experience for both agent, buyer, and seller, no doubt.
More Crappy Listing Photos
Looks like the seller wanted to keep their building anonymous, like the people who blur their homes out on Google Streetview.
Just Do It
That’s it. That’s the tweet.
Bonus: Bad Real Estate Takes
I run a channel where I gently call out some of the worst real estate takes.
No offense to the people responsible. We all have bad takes now and then, and getting called out for them is an important exercise in humility and accountability!
If Twitter is your drug of choice like it is mine, consider following these real estate Twitter (aka X) accounts if you are not already!
Conclusion
Get back to work.
Updated April 7, 2024; Originally published November 10, 2021
